Thursday, May 11, 2006

What's in my Future

What is in My Future?

When you pass my laundry room, you can see it. It is buried under sweatshirts and long pants. There is a little dust on the bottom. It was my mother's; she never really used it. Now it is mine. I may have to use it. My good sense tells me to save it. One day, I will need it.

A few years ago, I was in an auto accident. I was visiting my son and touring new hotels in the Disney area. My son was driving me to the Orlando airport so I could return home, when a car rental van came into our lane and hit us head on. I was on the passenger side, and got the most injuries. Luckily he wasn't badly hurt. I was code blue two times, I broke 4 ribs on each side, and I broke my sternum. I broke every bone in my left foot and punctured my lungs. The seat belt saved my life, but caused most of my injuries. I was in a coma for almost 3 weeks and had to return to NY on Amtrak, because I could not take the pressure of an airplane. I have also had some brain steam damage because of my head being shaken in the crash.

I still have a broken sternum and my left foot will never get much better. Because I am disabled I can never work as a Travel Agent again. I have trouble remembering names, places and perks of a vacation. So I was forced to sell my business. I was quite the world traveler. Now I can just write about the wonderful places I have been to.

I was under the impression I had MS for years. Just last month, I found out I was very wrong. I have Fibromyalgia. Now that is not as bad as MS, but it does get painful. Having the accident was a life-changing event for my whole family. But all in all it was a blessing. Right! I did say blessing. God gave me new gifts, to make up for the parts of my life that was gone. I can sit at the computer and just let my fingers fly over the keys, while God gives me the words to say. I have had the chance to meet and write about wonderful people.

I am allowed to be a friend to people that are generous and loving. Folks that have a strong faith in me. And pals that will stand up and cheer, pray and cry with each other. Living in central Florida has its perks. Seeing the space shuttle and fireworks from my back porch is nothing compared to watching palm trees and grass grow.

The thing in the laundry room? I may have to take it one day. I plan on walking, writing and laughing. I plan on singing, swimming and making new friends. I will give back all I have been given. I want to be a new Carolee, one that finds out what is good in the world. A Carolee that gives credit not blame to what has happened to me. A life can be changed in one second. A car comes into your lane and you are different. You see things in a different light.

I have never been angry with the van driver. He didn't say, "Today I will have an accident!" I think to get blessed you have to be a blessing. You have to get rid of anger, selfishness, and injustice. You cannot try to blame or accuse people that have hurt you. You have to love them. Yes, that is what I said! You have to love them. It is the only way you can heal emotionally, mentality, physically, and spiritually. You will be the one that gets the blessings and you will be part of the blessings that are given. I am living proof. Because of the accident I have been abundantly blessed. If you could sit in this chair and read my e-mail you would see how. If you lived in my family and meet my guys you would know how.

Oh, by the way! The thing in the laundry room is a suitcase, and I have been using it a lot again.
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by Carolee Kaufold

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